These sort of reminded me of Laugh-in...
From The Onion Dome. Lost in Translation (Conversations between Orthodox kids and their non-Orthodox friends)
Ashlee: "Do you HAVE to say everything three times? I mean, don't you think that's a little excessive? Wouldn't one Lord Have Mercy be enough?"
Ariadne: "No...no...no..."
Buster: "So, um, are you glad you moved here?"
Basil: "Yeah, I love the new church. Now that we've switched calendars my birthday doesn't fall in the middle of a fast!"
Kelly: "So, what's that Vespers thing you were talking about?"
Katya: "It's a church service preparing for Matins."
Kelly: "What's a Matins?"
Katya: "It's a service preparing for Liturgy!"
Kelly: "So what's Liturgy?!"
Katya: "It's the Sunday-morning service, with Communion."
Kelly: "Oh. What's this?"
Katya: "Vigil!"
Kelly: "Um. Katya, what's that mean?"
Katya: "...That it's long. Shh, the priest is talking."
Dimitri: "Dude...um...you're doing it wrong."
Donovan, pausing with two fingers touching his nose: "What?"
Dimitri: "The cross––sorry, it's just––forehead-belly button-shoulder- shoulder, okay? No, not like that, that's backwards––dude, you're doing it like the Catholics."
Donovan: "Forehead, belly button, what?"
Dimitri: "...Sure."
Marina: "So after Christmas––I mean, January 7th for you––"
Maddy: "Wait, what?"
Marina: "Well, you celebrate Christmas on the wrong day, but that's all right."
Maddy: "Wait, what?"
Babushka: "Sasha! Introduce me to your friend!"
Scott: "Who's Sasha?"
Alex: "I am!"
Taylor: "So where'd you go for Sunday breakfast? We went to IHOP."
Thea: "Breakfast? On a Sunday? Were you sick or something?"
Ariadne: "No...no...no..."
Buster: "So, um, are you glad you moved here?"
Basil: "Yeah, I love the new church. Now that we've switched calendars my birthday doesn't fall in the middle of a fast!"
Kelly: "So, what's that Vespers thing you were talking about?"
Katya: "It's a church service preparing for Matins."
Kelly: "What's a Matins?"
Katya: "It's a service preparing for Liturgy!"
Kelly: "So what's Liturgy?!"
Katya: "It's the Sunday-morning service, with Communion."
Kelly: "Oh. What's this?"
Katya: "Vigil!"
Kelly: "Um. Katya, what's that mean?"
Katya: "...That it's long. Shh, the priest is talking."
Dimitri: "Dude...um...you're doing it wrong."
Donovan, pausing with two fingers touching his nose: "What?"
Dimitri: "The cross––sorry, it's just––forehead-belly button-shoulder- shoulder, okay? No, not like that, that's backwards––dude, you're doing it like the Catholics."
Donovan: "Forehead, belly button, what?"
Dimitri: "...Sure."
Marina: "So after Christmas––I mean, January 7th for you––"
Maddy: "Wait, what?"
Marina: "Well, you celebrate Christmas on the wrong day, but that's all right."
Maddy: "Wait, what?"
Babushka: "Sasha! Introduce me to your friend!"
Scott: "Who's Sasha?"
Alex: "I am!"
Taylor: "So where'd you go for Sunday breakfast? We went to IHOP."
Thea: "Breakfast? On a Sunday? Were you sick or something?"
Posts
Bwahahahahhahahaa.
ReplyDeleteMy minor claim to fame is that I am friends with the Intrepid Editor's wife (and the Intrepid Editor himself, too)
The scenario of Orthodox kids talking to their friends illustrates that we need to do a better job of teaching our children the Orthodox religion.
ReplyDeleteThis can be done by parents devoting more time to religion, and explaining it to their children. Also, parents should ensure that their children attend Sunday School each Sunday during the academic year.